smokmantceconla.gq If both parties said yes, a real date was set up.
The dates were transcribed and computer software was used to analyze the words and speech to see if any characteristics of the language corresponded to the participants' reporting of feeling a sense of connection. Women reported a sense of connection to men who used appreciative language "That's awesome" or "Good for you" and sympathy "That must be tough on you".
Women also reported clicking with male partners who interrupted them — not as a way to redirect the conversation but to demonstrate understanding and engagement, for example, by finishing a sentence or adding to it. It's just the opposite," McFarland said. So talking about the empowered party is a sensible strategy toward feeling connected.
While interrupting could be viewed as positive, asking a lot of questions tended to have a negative result. Questions were used by women to keep a lagging conversation going and by men who had nothing to say. Successful dates, the paper notes, were associated with women being the focal point and engaged in the conversation, and men demonstrating alignment with and understanding of the women. Shared stories also indicated a sense of connection, as did speakers who showed enthusiasm by varying their speech to get louder and softer.
The researchers said the longer it took for the individuals to decide on a date, the more they reported having a bonding experience, suggesting communication can change someone's feelings about another person and break the association with traits. Further studies could look at same-sex relationships, for example, or could explore the transitions to other states, like marriage. Enter your keywords for search.
You are here Home. Study of speed dating: What makes couples click? Speed dating Photo by wavebreakmedia, Shutterstock, www. Data Science Social and Emotional Learning. Researchers analyze the encounters of men and women during four-minute speed dates to find out what makes couples feel connected.
Can you "click" with someone after only four minutes? Do you know how long it takes for a guy and a gal to "click" in the first stage of building a bond that may lead to a lasting relationship? Seconds, according to numerous studies. But new research suggests that connection can be strengthened -- or blown away -- within four or five minutes, because what people say, and how they say it, may be nearly as important as how they look.
McFarland teamed up with Dan Jurafsky, professor of linguistics at Stanford, to study "speed dating," the current rage among many singles, and more specifically, the role of communications during that brief encounter. First impressions are important, and McFarland concedes that appearance is the leading factor in that first click.
Women like taller men, males prefer slimmer women, and so forth. But just simply asking a question during a four minute "date" can change that.
Speed dating has been around for more than a decade now, and it is especially popular on some web sites. The basic idea is to let singles meet lots of potential mates and pick which ones they would like to get to know. The researchers recruited graduate students at Stanford, one of the nation's premier universities, for their experiment, so we aren't talking about losers here, and some findings may not apply to everybody. The participants participated in nearly 1, "speed dates," so there were lots of opportunities to click, and they were wired for sound.
Transcripts were completed of the entire conversations between all males and females, providing a warehouse full of chitchat as they tried to decide whether they liked or couldn't stand the person in front of them. Both genders express excitement when they connect, but often by different means.
Women raise and vary their pitch and vary their loudness. Women don't like questions. They "feel disconnected when they have to ask men questions, or when men ask them questions. And the words each participant used, like how many times the pronouns "I" or "you" came up, appeared to be an effort to shift the focus of the conversation back and forth, but both genders thought the session was most successful if it focused on the female.
That may be partly due to how the experiment was set up. In this case, as in most speed dating experiments, the male moves from female to female, trying to click. That's usually the way it works in a bar. That puts the woman in charge. All she has to do is sit there and judge her date. The study concedes the result might be different if the woman takes the offensive and the male awaits each supplicant. Researchers at Northwestern University reversed the roles and found when the females went from male to male, thus putting the guys in a position of power, there was no gender difference in pickiness.
The ideal result of speed dating, of course, is to have both participants decide they would like to take the next step.
McFarland said only about 20 percent of the Stanford dates resulted in a "match," but of those only about 9 percent actually contacted each other. And a month later, only nine "pairs" were actually dating. That's after nearly 1, speed dates.